Couples Therapy in Los Angeles

No relationship is perfect. Sometimes couples need help resolving conflict or understanding each other. Couples therapy and marriage counseling are excellent solutions for that.

You are taking a brave step in your relationship. I would be honored to help. If you're ready to start couples counseling, contact me to get started.

Couples Therapy & Infidelity

Infidelity can be devastating in a relationship. But if you're here, I have good news: you're taking a meaningful step towards moving past an affair, hurt, and break in trust. The journey toward healing and rebuilding a relationship after infidelity is challenging, but it is also an opportunity for growth, deeper connection, and renewed commitment. At Therapy for Adults, we understand the complexities of infidelity and are dedicated to helping couples navigate through this painful experience with compassion and expertise.

Once trust is broken, it's not easy to rebuild. Employing proven therapeutic techniques, we can rebuild trust, ease hurt, and improve your relationship for the better. Through a structured approach, we address the underlying issues that led to the infidelity, foster open communication, and develop strategies for rebuilding trust. This process is not about assigning blame but understanding and healing together. We create a supportive environment where both partners can express their feelings, fears, and hopes for the future.

In couples therapy, we'll create a safe environment where both partners can be honest about the affair and what led up to it. If you're committed to moving past infidelity, honesty is crucial. It’s essential to explore the context of the affair, including unmet needs, emotional disconnects, and external stressors. By understanding these factors, we can work together to prevent future occurrences and build a more resilient relationship.

Couples Therapy & Anxiety

Anxiety can change our personalities, behaviors, and lives—this includes how we interact in our relationships. Anxiety often manifests in relationships as irritability, overthinking, sensitivity, and outbursts of anger. These reactions can create misunderstandings and conflicts, straining the bond between partners. Understanding the role of anxiety in your relationship is crucial to managing its impact.

If you or your partner struggles with anxiety, it has likely played out in your relationship. This might look like irritability, overthinking, sensitivity, outbursts of anger, and more. Since there is no playbook on how to be in your unique relationship, anxiety can run wild—especially when many of us are too ashamed to share our relationship problems with others. In couples therapy, we explore how anxiety influences your interactions and develop coping strategies to mitigate its effects.

Identifying Anxiety Triggers and Patterns

The first step in addressing anxiety in your relationship is identifying the triggers and patterns that exacerbate it. These can include work stress, financial concerns, or unresolved personal issues. With the help of a couples therapist, recognizing these triggers, you and your partner can develop proactive strategies to manage anxiety before it escalates into conflict. Couples therapy sessions provide a safe space to explore these triggers and understand their impact on your relationship.

Building Healthy Communication Skills

Effective communication is essential in managing anxiety within a relationship. Anxiety can impact cognition, communication style, and avoidance of difficult conversations. In couples counseling, we focus on building healthy communication skills, including active listening, expressing feelings constructively, and using "I" statements to reduce defensiveness. These skills help couples navigate conversations about anxiety and other sensitive topics with greater ease and understanding.

Developing Coping Mechanisms

With the help of couples therapy, coping tools and mechanisms can be learned that help individuals use to manage stress and anxiety. Through couples counseling, we work together to identify and implement coping mechanisms that are effective for both partners. This might include mindfulness exercises, relaxation techniques, and setting boundaries. By developing a toolkit of coping strategies, couples can better manage anxiety and its impact on their relationship.

 Marriage Counseling & Couples Therapy FAQs

People often feel ashamed when facing problems in their relationships, even though they shouldn't. Because of shame, people do not openly discuss their experiences in couples therapy and marriage counseling. During sessions, I'll provide education and a safe space that you might struggle to find elsewhere.

Do we need couples counseling?

In my opinion, every couple can benefit from counseling.

Some couples have more pressing issues but every couple has something to work on or room to improve—whether it's about inlaws, children, love languages, or something else.

If you feel that your relationship could improve or feel that your relationship is urgently in need of help, couples counseling can help you and your partner.

Can marriage counseling heal a broken relationship?

Couples therapy and marriage counseling can repair and heal a broken relationship, although I can't guarantee the outcome of therapy. However, willingness to attend couples counseling is a promising sign both of you are invested enough in your relationship. Relationship repairing requires being vulnerable and discussing some uncomfortable truths.

The more invested you and your partner are, the more likely you are to heal your relationship in therapy.

How do we prepare for our first counseling session?

Other than the logistics of beginning therapy (paperwork, scheduling your session, etc.), there isn't much you can physically prepare. However, mental and emotional preparation for couples therapy is different.

Before your first session, I recommend asking yourself questions like these:

1. What do I want out of couples counseling? What are some of my tangible goals?

2. Am I willing to be vulnerable and honest?

3. What about couples therapy worries me?

4. Am I committed to the process?

Your answers and insights to these questions are great to discuss in your first session. Being clear about your goals and open about your concerns can help set a positive tone for your therapy journey. However, your goal just might be to “fight less” and that’s an excellent goal. These do not need to be fully formed ideas or goals before your first session.

What do people talk about in couples therapy?

When starting therapy, many people wonder where to start and what they're going to talk about.  This concern adds unnecessary pressure to the process by racking and taxing your brain for things to discuss.

Remember that your couples therapist is a trained professional—they'll guide you through topics to help you get the most out of therapy and improve your relationship.

Generally, you'll discuss things like:

1. Conflict resolution

2. Communication styles

3. Sex, sexuality, and intimacy

4. Children

5. Inlaws

6. Politics, religion, culture, beliefs, and values

7. Lifestyle choices

8. Finances

9. Social life

10. Personalities

11. Your individual past experiences and emotional struggles

Nothing is off the table. When we enter into couples therapy or marriage counseling, we don't just talk about the relationship—we talk about ourselves as individuals. We discuss trauma, formative memories, emotional problems, thought patterns, and more.

Not only will you gain a deeper understanding of your partner and relationship dynamics but you'll also gain a deeper understanding of yourself.

Can we attend therapy sessions remotely?

Yes, therapy sessions are remote and through a secure video conferencing platform. This option provides flexibility and convenience, especially for couples with busy schedules or those who live in different locations. Remote sessions are just as effective as in-person sessions and allow you to receive support from the comfort of your own home.

What should we do if we experience a crisis between sessions?

If you experience a crisis between sessions, it's important to reach out for help immediately. Many therapists offer emergency contact options or can provide resources for immediate support. Additionally, developing a crisis plan during therapy sessions can help you manage urgent situations more effectively. This plan might include agreed-upon steps to take, such as contacting a crisis hotline or reaching out to a trusted friend or family member.

How do we know if couples therapy is working?

Progress in couples therapy can be seen in various ways, including improved communication, reduced conflict, increased understanding, and a stronger emotional connection. Regular feedback sessions with your therapist can help track your progress and address any ongoing concerns. It’s also important to note that progress may not always be linear, and some setbacks are normal. The key is to remain committed to the process and continue working towards your goals.

Will our therapy sessions be confidential?

Yes, all therapy sessions are confidential. Your therapist is bound by ethical and legal standards to maintain your privacy. This means that what you discuss in therapy will not be shared with anyone else without your explicit permission, except in rare circumstances where there is a risk of harm to yourself or others. Confidentiality is a fundamental part of creating a safe and trusting therapeutic environment.

How do we handle disagreements about therapy goals?

It’s not uncommon for couples to have different goals when starting therapy. These differences can be discussed and negotiated during your sessions. Your therapist will help facilitate these conversations, ensuring that both partners feel heard and respected. Finding common ground and aligning your goals is an important part of the therapeutic process and can lead to a more cohesive and successful outcome.

Can couples therapy help even if we are considering separation or divorce?

Yes, couples therapy can be beneficial even if you are considering separation or divorce. Therapy can provide a space to explore your feelings, improve communication, and make informed decisions about the future of your relationship. If separation or divorce is the chosen path, therapy can also help facilitate a more amicable and respectful process, especially if children are involved.

Therapudic Approaches

The Therapeutic Approach

At Therapy for Adults, we use a variety of therapeutic approaches tailored to meet the unique needs of each couple. Our goal is to provide a safe and supportive environment where both partners can explore their feelings, identify challenges, and develop solutions. Here’s an overview of some of the therapeutic techniques that might be implemented in session:

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)

Emotionally Focused Therapy is based on the idea that emotional bonds are the foundation of a successful relationship. In EFT, there is a focus on identifying and expressing emotions, improving emotional responsiveness, and fostering secure attachments between partners. This approach helps couples understand and change the patterns that create distress and disconnection in their relationship.

Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy helps couples identify and change negative thought patterns and behaviors that contribute to relationship problems. By challenging these thoughts and developing healthier behaviors, couples can improve their interactions and resolve conflicts more effectively. CBT is particularly useful for addressing specific issues such as communication problems, infidelity, and anxiety.

Gottman Method

The Gottman Method is a research-based approach to couples therapy that focuses on building a strong foundation of friendship, managing conflict, and creating shared meaning. Using techniques derived from decades of research, the Gottman Method helps couples strengthen their relationship by improving communication, increasing intimacy, and addressing underlying issues. This method is highly structured and provides practical tools for couples to use in their everyday lives.

Integrative Behavioral Couple Therapy (IBCT)

Integrative Behavioral Couple Therapy combines traditional behavioral interventions with acceptance-based strategies. This approach helps couples change negative behavior patterns while also learning to accept and understand each other’s differences. IBCT is particularly effective for couples who feel stuck in their current relationship dynamics and are looking for new ways to connect and resolve conflicts.

Meet Steven Reigns, a Los Angeles Couples Therapist

My name is Steven Reigns, and I'm a couples therapist in Los Angeles. 

For over ten years, I have helped couples and individuals process and improve issues within their relationships.

My clients at Therapy for Adults appreciate my solutions-oriented approach, although I tailor it to the couples' needs. Working collaboratively, we proceed at a pace that meets you and your partner’s needs.

I have experience working with couples and individuals facing conflict, anxiety, and relationship issues.